Category Archives: Celebrate

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September 25, 2017

“Thankful, thankful.”


“Thankful, thankful.”

It’s not really a sentence but it’s something my mom said often.  It stood alone.  It set a wonderful example for me.

What it meant was what it sounds like of course.  But the context defines its depth.  This was uttered after tragedies like my dad’s heart surgeries or her own elderly traumas. About six months before she went to be with the Lord she totaled her car, and someone else’s,  by running a stop sign near my house.  When I was helping her fill out the police report her analysis was “I didn’t stop because I didn’t see anyone else coming.”  But then she just volunteered all the things there were to be thankful in the situation: yes her face was black and blue, but nothing broken.  Yes the cars were totaled, but she had insurance and the other driver didn’t have a scratch.  Yes she had run a stop sign, but she was just ticketed for that, her license was not revoked. (Which you can see it should have been. She did little driving after this, though.)

You may have heard people answer “How are you?” with “better than I deserve!” to make a point, but this was my sweet mommy’s genuine attitude and mindset. She really had no expectations, and so she was literally thankful for everything.

“My blood pressure is up but my neighbor who is a doctor is coming every day to check on it for me.  Isn’t that wunnnnnerful? Thankful, thankful.”

“I can’t find my bank papers, but I know my money is safe.  If I can’t find them, no one else can either!  I have good resources for my age that are in the bank! Thankful, thankful.”

“Oh does my foot ache!  I just want the trumpet to blow it hurts so badly….and I had terrible dreams last night which Doctor Dave says is from my medicine.  But today is my last day taking it!  And when I woke up I listened to David Jeremiah and it was sooooooooooo good! When the trumpet blows I’ll be with the Lord! Thankful, thankful.”

The last three years of my life have been the hardest by far.  There has been much loss and sorrow.  But as if for the first time, listening to all the news, seeing all the problems big and small, strife everywhere….. I remembered my mother saying “thankful, thankful.”  And I just realized it’s a choice.  By Gods grace I can always be thankful, first and foremost for the cross:

“Holy God in love became

Perfect man to beat my blame

On the cross he took my sin

By his death I live again.”

And this truth enables, even in the mundane, a mindset that there is always something to be thankful for.  “In everything, give thanks: for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thess 5:18

Today I am thankful for the sunset on a sweltering day in a town that yes, I have always wanted to leave for the countryside…. but which has been a lovely home for my family for 26 years!  Thankful, thankful.

Downtown Wheaton September sunset

I am thankful for my siblings (especially after the loss of both my parents) and the special surprise of a sister visit – 5 days long!!! – for my birthday!  Thankful, thankful. Yes the teen years being expressions like these below, and other challenges as well.  Yes I’m sad my babies are growing up… and the seasons change.  But the growth is the result of good health and love; they are growing into young men like their father and big brothers who work hard and play hard and follow Jesus.  Thankful, thankful.

Budding Teenagers at our hometown pizza place, a booth we have been sitting at for 20 years

April 10, 2014

Gain and Loss

Two weeks ago I lost my dear father.  He was 85, so he lived longer than many, but I still wanted more of him. As I have been reflecting on this loss, I have been struck by God’s kindness and wisdom through it all. He always has the last word. A friend said, “In the mystery of God, loss directly contributes to the great gain that is promised to us.” This has been my experience these last two weeks, even as “sorrows like sea billows roll,” and I thought I’d share the details with you, in hopes it provides some encouragement.
too young to be pall bearers, the twins watch with sober quiet as grandpa

too young to be pall bearers, the twins watch with sober quiet as grandpa’s casket is brought into the church

Loss:
Seeing the lifeless mortality of one dearly loved, the empty figure of a man, now lying in a cardboard box.  He was strong enough, once, to carry my sleeping twelve-year-old body in from the car after late night road trips.
Gain:
God’s wisdom in turning our enemy, death, into a teacher; the eternity and value of what’s unseen, revealed by the decay of what’s visible.

 

grandsons

grandsons

Loss:
A wife without her friend and love and co-laborer for 85% of her life! It hurts like a heart-attack every time realization strikes her that he’s gone. “I just get a terrible pain in my heart” was her strained description.
Gain:
She is learning to turn to HIM more, since she can’t turn to him anymore. She is being made ready even as he is enjoying the place that was made ready for him. She is remembering there is no marriage in heaven; and yet the rejoicing that the marriage supper of the Lamb will be far greater even than this pain.
 IMG_6616
Loss:
No more calling him for advice, no more of his perspective in my life, no more bright eyes that see me and respond in genuine joyful communion.
Gain:
The One in whom he formed his perspectives, the Word on which he based his advice, the joy of oneness in Christ with those I love . . . are all still available to me, and now of greater worth. The love and joy and fellowship in Jesus we are yet to experience, for which He redeemed us, is unimaginably glorious. The blessed hope of it is tangibly, painfully, real.
is this really happening?

is this really happening?

Loss:
His birthday card, in which I poured out my heart more eloquently than ever, to encourage and uplift and express love and appreciation, got to him one day late!  He didn’t hear all I had prepared to tell him.
Gain:
He is hearing the angels singing, “Holy! Holy! Holy!”  He is hearing, “Well done!” He is hearing what I can’t even imagine!—something God has prepared for those who love him.
five grandsons staying for the final goodbye

five grandsons staying for the final goodbye

Loss:
The aching finality of this change, the passing of a season never to cycle back again, the meaninglessness now of artifacts from his life’s work, and belongings.
Gain:
The transforming portrait of life as a vapor!  As a flower fades, and its place remembers it no more, so will MY life be! My stuff, my projects, my important and urgent in this world are vanity. Indeed, “Only one life, ’twill soon be passed; only what’s done for Christ will last.”
Philippians 3:7-11
But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith—that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
Other Scriptures these thoughts are based on:
Psalm 103:15-16, Isaiah 40; John 14:3; Revelation 19:4-9; 2 Corinthians 4; John 15:9-13; 1 Peter 1:3; Titus 2:3; 1 Corinthians 2:6-10; 1 Corinthians 3:5-15
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